| Author | Comment |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 21 Apr 2005
16:15 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Continue this odd topic here. |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 21 Apr 2005
22:15 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L, fortunately, has an extra liver and replaces the old one that Jc took with the newer, better, faster, more efficient one he keeps in his pocket at all times. Then L takes DSP's lightsaber, sharpens it in a pencil sharpener, and beats Jc and TI-freak over the head with it. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 22 Apr 2005
03:57 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Jc is going on vacation for today and most of tomorrow. Yay for my Gamecube's new portable screen! Please don't attack me until I get back. Ah what the heck, why not. :) |
PogoDaMonkey
Dragoon
Posted: 22 Apr 2005
04:03 GMT
Total Posts: 72 | PDM tells zedd that -1000 -1000 is from his "worthless slime" card, that miraculously surivived the flame and wasn't truly needed anyway. (Look up at "Say Nay And Die") PDM then summons the weakest, most downtrodden unit of all time, the chickens from Zelda! zedd wonders "Which came first, the chicken or the egg?" and tries to ask the chicken, which calls many of its brethren and peck him to death.
Run out of the area to escape this, i dare ya... |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 22 Apr 2005
06:02 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak Picks up a chair from a college basket ball court, and throws the chair at L, impaling him with two of the legs.
While JC is inactive, TI Freak straps him to a large nuclear miscle, and sends him to outerspace, and detonates the bomb. |
Xero Xcape
Marine
Posted: 22 Apr 2005
06:56 GMT
Total Posts: 29 | XX collects all the lost mental powers that have accumlated during this war... and sends EVERYONE back to the beggining!
I counter DSP's mind powers with a comatose zombie!
---
BASIC flames are for n00bs, you don't want to be a n00b do you? | My other calc is a Porsche. |
threefingeredguy
Ghost
Posted: 22 Apr 2005
16:34 GMT
Total Posts: 1189 | since were back at the beginning, or near the beginning, 3fg goes to zombie burger and ordrs 2 million burgers. in order to fill the demand, whoever works there (was it jc?) goes out and kills everyone in the surrounding area except himself, 3fg, and zedd, cause the alliance stuff. yeah. 3fg, in order to consume the burgers, accelerates the burgers to the speed of light so that they have infinitely small length and all it in his stomach. after digesting and excreting the burgers, he watches family guy.
"dammit janet!"
---
Someone call for an exterminator? |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 23 Apr 2005
13:04 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | It was me.
There was a reason I didn't kill you guys to make burgers. You'd taste awful... and L bursts out of TFG's stomach à la Alien.
And I'm back! |
zedd
Ultralisk
Posted: 23 Apr 2005
14:25 GMT
Total Posts: 428 | Hey Pmonkey! Yeah U!
zedd didn't have 2 run. bi7ch
and ALL the cards have been incinerated.
---
Na + H2O = Keanu Reeves........WOW |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 23 Apr 2005
18:53 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L's card is linked to him and has his powers on a small scale, therefore it does not incinerate because it is immune to fire. L shoots a cyanide bomb down Zedd's throat for trying to burn his card. L wishes he had attacked Jc while he was gone, but makes up for it by kicking Jc hard in the face. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 24 Apr 2005
05:00 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Jc regularly uses anti-kick face cream (it's moisturizing too! <_< ), so the kick is deflected onto TI-Freak. In the process, L's leg is ripped off. |
korkow
Ultralisk
Posted: 24 Apr 2005
20:18 GMT
Total Posts: 465 | Korkow goes to Walmart and buys some anti-kicking cream (The herb scented kind!) and has fun watching people try to kick him! |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 24 Apr 2005
20:45 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L uppercuts korkow for trying to evade his wrath. Jc is devoured by killer locusts. |
darksideprogramming
Guardian
Posted: 24 Apr 2005
21:00 GMT
Total Posts: 1005 | Well, unfortunately for all, during his little vacation, DSP hired THE Duke Nukem to be his personal hitman.
"Come get some"
*Duke Nukem goes on a killing rampage, completely obliterating everyone except for DSP, who is, of course, immortal*
"Let God sort 'em out" |
PogoDaMonkey
Dragoon
Posted: 25 Apr 2005
04:06 GMT
Total Posts: 72 | ...and PDM bribes Duke with more money than DSP will ever have to stay down and die, then takes back his money. Oh, zedd, your card was secretly teleported during your maniacal and completely justified rage to their silly cards. Apparently yours survived. |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 25 Apr 2005
06:24 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak is the one that rips the leg off and hurls it to a pack of starving dogs. And since JC only uses anti-kick face scream, TI Freak kicks him the balls, making him fall over and cry as everyone laughs at him hysterically. |
zedd
Ultralisk
Posted: 25 Apr 2005
07:39 GMT
Total Posts: 428 | OK Pmonkey. that's it. u're go in' down.
..........................................
zedd goes to walmart. zedd steals a few guns, ammo, ligther fluid, matches, lots of wood, steel, tires, a grill, a few steaks, a really big helicopter, nukes, dvd's, plasma screen tvs, a digital watch, a lawn mower, and more.....
Zedd has started to dismantle some of the equipment for customization.
....................
meanwhile zede has stolen the card.... he takes out all the worthless slime and shoves it down pface's throat. he takes the dagger from his hand and carefully cuts open the stomach area. zed pulls out the heart, lungs, and intestines. he bleeds them and sautees them on a pan. some spices are added for the flavoring.
...................................................
Jc! here's your diner! :lol:
---
Na + H2O = Keanu Reeves........WOW |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 25 Apr 2005
13:18 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | >>>TI Freak kicks him the balls, making him fall over and cry as everyone laughs at him hysterically.<<<
Ouch! That's hitting below the belt (literally!)
TI-Freak is kicked in that area as well by a cleated foot.
Zedd, you can't spell "dinner" for beans. A "Diner" is a restaurant. So fine, Zombie Burger has a new special. lol
[Edited by JcCorp on 25-Apr-05 22:18] |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 25 Apr 2005
20:18 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak was prepared, as he is wearing a titanium cup, though he still falls over from the strength of the kick. He then gets up and steals DSP's lightsabre (since he is just standing around, and supposedly immortal, so he won't need it) and kills everyone except zedd, because of the kick a$$ squirel, who has allied itself with my army of squirels. |
PogoDaMonkey
Dragoon
Posted: 26 Apr 2005
04:15 GMT
Total Posts: 72 | Sadly, Wal-Mart arrest zedd for shoplifting, sending him back over to china where he is interrogated by the communist army. He is then tortured for information of why zedd killled their leader (who was diguised as a monkey at the time). Silly Commies.
zedds squirrel then realizes he left his nuts back in the freezer (maybe zedds too? lol j/k), and runs back to get them. He is mysteriously locked into the freezer so he can end up on a tropical island, then get burned to death by a volcano.
[Edited by PogoDaMonkey on 26-Apr-05 13:16] |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 26 Apr 2005
15:50 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L smacks DSP in the face for using a hitman to do his dirty work. L then proceeds to transmutate all human bones into uranium-235. Beofre ppl die (or are just tortured in DSP's case), L sprays liquid nitrogen on the groin areas of both Jc and TI-freak. Funfunfun! |
Xero Xcape
Marine
Posted: 26 Apr 2005
15:58 GMT
Total Posts: 29 | XX being helpful supplies L with a LeadSuit, and all the males with Adimantium Cups...
---
BASIC flames are for n00bs, you don't want to be a n00b do you? | My other calc is a Porsche. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 26 Apr 2005
17:31 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | You really are a bit too late, XX.
>>L sprays liquid nitrogen on the groin areas of both Jc and TI-freak. Funfunfun!<<
Nah, you missed and hit my hand, which convienitently was covering the area. Jc whacks L over the head with his frozen hand and watches it break into tiny shards that creep into L's head painfully. He screams as my hand infiltrates his brain and takes total control of his body. He brutally mutilates himself in 1,000 different ways. :) |
threefingeredguy
Ghost
Posted: 27 Apr 2005
15:47 GMT
Total Posts: 1189 | wal mart is my employer's competitor so we go in, set them up the bomb, rescue zedd, get out of there, and blow up the entire chain of stores. 3fg runs away and buys mexico. he sells it to george w. for 200 trillion dollars. 3fg retires in infinite comfort.
---
Someone call for an exterminator? |
zedd
Ultralisk
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
08:35 GMT
Total Posts: 428 | zedd apologizes for not being here when he was interrogated by Commies. besides Pmonkey, if u read one of the other posts.... then u would know that zedd owns them!
Hey Jc! Nice AVATAR! just get rid of I'm Jc. it's sorta creepy. she doesn't look anything like u! zedd saw your pic in your forum.
and 3FG thanx for saving zedd's @ss!
and tifreak...
<<------foamy---
[Edited by zedd on 28-Apr-05 17:38]
---
Na + H2O = Keanu Reeves........WOW |
darksideprogramming
Guardian
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
11:24 GMT
Total Posts: 1005 | No, PDM, all my employees are incapable of being bribed.
And yes, 3fg, I am immortal, but I like the saber so...
DSP retaliates to 3fg's attempt to steal his lightsaber by pushing hi back using the force and simultaneously lopping off his head. |
Xero Xcape
Marine
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
12:46 GMT
Total Posts: 29 | XX counters with Luke Skywalker's move from "Masters of somethinganother"
Back to down to foward to up to back to down to right to up to back and then Triangle!!!!
---
BASIC flames are for n00bs, you don't want to be a n00b do you? | My other calc is a Porsche. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
13:07 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | >>>Hey Jc! Nice AVATAR! just get rid of I'm Jc. it's sorta creepy. she doesn't look anything like u!<<<
Jc just wanted to say who he was, he didn't even know there was text until he looked really closely for a few hours (he got distracted, hehehe :D ). But he's clever, you see, and actually bothers to attack you in the post. Jc takes zedd and carfully scrubs off his face with DSP's lightsaber. |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
15:44 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L re-applies zedd's face with melted bits of Jc's hand he extracts from his cranium. *Oops!* My bad zedd, that was actually mercury! Oh well, L papeer cuts everyone but DSP to death. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
17:00 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Jc offers L an alliance, and also wonders how his hand was made of mercury...
Oh yeah, that wasn't Jc, it was a T-1000. Enjoy, guys. Jc has about 5 of them running around. |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 28 Apr 2005
22:14 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | You know what's creepy about that, I saw a guy driving a van today that looked exactly like the T-1000 in cop form.
*Anyways*, L accepts Jc's alliance proposal, re-opens (for the millionth time) zombie burger, and throws a bunch of T-101's and a few T-X's onto the field, just for kicks |
zedd
Ultralisk
Posted: 29 Apr 2005
14:48 GMT
Total Posts: 428 | oh god! competition!
since DSP doesn't respect 3FG..... zedd will use the force to cut the cheese in front of him. .....maximum effect...
Zed throws a bomb at L...it blows up....L dies....Jc also dies.....Jc miraculously appears again...over a huge hole..aparently created by bomb......so does L......Zed goes ?????......he curses ..... L falls into a land fill....gets crushed by a truck.... Jc got dumped by his avatar because he never fell...he never learned the law of gravity...and pissed off avatar girl.... zed covers them in dirt.... they are never to be seen for a billion years....(billion yrs later).. sun goes Supernova..... Jc goes..ooooo!fireworks....L goes holy $%^(%$*^&%^....... that part is censored...
beat that
---
Na + H2O = Keanu Reeves........WOW |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 29 Apr 2005
15:48 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Fine.
Just before Jc and L die, Jc uses his time-traveling ability to warp to before zedd visited CG in the first place. He tells zedd that if he enters the site, he will die eventually because of it. Zedd, being the zedd he is, visits the site anyways. Jc and L then go to the present, and find zedd, who suddenly recalls his memory that he will die. He drops on the ground and pleads for mercy. He tries to fire off tons of weapons and many strategies, but Jc is immortal and just ignores all of it. He draws a white, gleaming sword and zedd begins to panic. Zedd's pants become soaked as he contemplates his doom and pleads for his life. All of a sudden, 3FG runs in to save the day. Unfortunately, he runs right into a hippo, who bites him in half. Zedd then attempts to call on his clones to save him, only to realize that L just encased them in cement and dropped them into the sun. Jc raises the sword above zedd's head, chants some mysterious words, and zedd is wiped from all existance, and no one can remember that he ever existed. The only proof that he was ever here were some posts on calcgames.org, but the administrators figured it was a joke and deleted all of the posts. On top of all that, Jc's "avatar girl" soon apologizes for her behavior and admits that she can't live without Jc's endless wit and love. They live a happy life forever. L and DSP can have all my other former avatar girls. :) |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 29 Apr 2005
16:24 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | Fine, but I get dibs on Z's girl too :) .
To finish off a few more pplz, L pulls out his own sword, a 5-and-a-half foot beast made from an alloy of silver and titanium. This thing shines brighter than the dawn rising right behind L and is sharper than Jc's wit :) (dang that's sharp!). L blesses himself with a prayer, protects himself with some words of arcane magic, and thrills himself by choppin heads. If you are listed, your head was chopped off, but with extreme elegance and divinity: Korkow, Xero Xcape, Greenorange, PogoDaMonkey, TI Freak, and Threefingeredguy. allynfolksjr, Andy, and Zkostik are spared by their own grace. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
14:28 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | L... there are no responses. It looks like we won. |
darksideprogramming
Guardian
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
17:00 GMT
Total Posts: 1005 | Unfortunately, DSP will not allow the war he has started to come to such an abrupt end.
DSP uses his spleen superpowers to blow zedd away with a massive blast of gas. DSP has a herd of cows trample korkow. DSP sics a man with only four fingers on 3fg. DSP sics a snake armed with a pogo stick on PDM. DSP dooms XX by smacking him with the number 1. And finally, DSP bashes TI Freak over the head with an HP calc.
DSP, in his infinite wisdom, decides to spare A, Z, and Andy, just because they are gods on this site. DSP also decides to spare L and Jc, due to the sharing of the girls. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
19:07 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | How ironic... and who's zedd? |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
21:28 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | Obviously not important... :) . |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
21:46 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak escapes the slaughter, as what everyone thought was TI Freak, was just a hologram.
TI Freak then creates a special Hell, where DSP can only have a TI-81.
TI Freak casts a teleport spell on L, sending him in to a nearby black hole.
He attacks no one else, since no one else has attacked... |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
21:50 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L uses the infinitesimal dragging out of time by the black hole to think about impprtant things, escapes with ease, and joins DSP in the ultimate bashing of ti-freak who tried *and failed* to send us to our deaths. ti-freak's coroner notes observantly that part of the blunt force trauma suffered by ti-freak is shaped strikingly like a TI-81. |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 30 Apr 2005
22:31 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak survives this, as he is truly a Goa'uld (google stargate sg1) and the symbiote heals the body. After several days of resting, TI Freak causes an earthquake that opens up under neath the feet of everyone that has attacked him within the last 7 or so posts, and they all fall to their doom as the crack closes back up, sealing them under the crust. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 1 May 2005
04:20 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak thinks he has everyone defeated... but Jc proves him wrong when all of his attackers fall into Jc's underground fortress. After some basic training, the attackers learn how to operate JcCorp Satellites and use them and their lasers to fry TI Freak to a crispy crisp. |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 1 May 2005
15:51 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | Jc forgot to mention how L and Jc dine on TI-freak's charred remains. Mmmmmmmm...crunchy :) |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 2 May 2005
11:23 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Jc gives up his old avatar to one of his allies (whoever calls her) in favor of his new one, based off of a character in a very old short story he wrote. (I had to photoshop the hair and eye colors.) |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 2 May 2005
16:30 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | L has a hearty chuckle about Jc's new sig and continues to ebjoy his joint reign. |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 3 May 2005
17:17 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Argh! For the first time, a war topic has not been active! I guess that means that unless our team breaks up, this topic will end... that gives me a crazy idea... but I'm nice and I won't. |
Lunchbox
Carrier
Posted: 3 May 2005
21:05 GMT
Total Posts: 2007 | Of course you won't. It would occur you much trouble. |
TI Freak
Probe
Posted: 3 May 2005
21:30 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | TI Freak's conciousness is downloaded into the positronic brain of an android, made like Mega Man, but made of Adamantium, so he is indestructible, and uses a quantum singularity reactor to power his Mega Blaster, as it is an indefinite power source.
TI Freak blasts L and JC for attempting to be rid of me, and their bodies are incinerated from the power.
[Edited by TI Freak on 04-May-05 18:48] |
JcCorp
Probe
Posted: 4 May 2005
11:36 GMT
Total Posts:
Edit | Jc did a neat trick to dodge the blast. He opened up a hole in himself to let the plasma shots from the MegaMan-esque cannon pass "through" him. He then sticks a magnet to TI-Freak's head and watches his circuitry go all crooked. The mega blaster backfires upon itself.
Speaking of Megaman, I found an awesome downloadable game where you play as a hard hat/metool/met in Megaman style. |
Jonny23451
Ultralisk
Posted: 4 May 2005
19:40 GMT
Total Posts: 214 | Lol this place is sooo random. |
